In speech class, I encourage my students to share something about themselves in their speeches. What I mean is that
instead of giving a speech full of facts and statistics, connect the speaker to
the audience through self-disclosure. Telling a pertinent story about yourself
in a speech may tell us why you care about your subject, which, in turn, makes
us care. Stories that expose our vulnerabilities can connect us on a level with
which we may not be fully aware.
The rewards can be great, but sometimes
speakers and writers can be hesitant to “let it all hang out.” There is no
right or wrong as to what to reveal and what not to reveal, and everyone has to
make their own decisions. I am comfortable telling my students some of the errors
or embarrassing incidents that have happened to me, and they laugh, and I think
it helps give them permission to not worry about being perfect, and it connects
us. But there is a risk when it comes to self-disclosure, so there are a few
stories that I will never share, and that’s OK. I have enough embarrassing
moments to go around, so I’m not worried about keeping some to myself.
In an interview on NPR with Walter
Kirn, author of eight books, including Up in the Air, he said writers try to
“build bridges between the parts of people’s selves that are hidden from
people’s social lives.” He once had an editor who told him that people don’t
want to hear how handsome he is or how well he does, they want to hear about
screw ups and embarrassing habits -- those are the things we all have in
common.
Let’s celebrate our imperfections and
share who we (or our characters) really are, to strengthen our writing,
and connect us.
Write soon,
Mary
